Ah, Christmas shopping…it reminds me of how much I love Halloween. I was at the mall earlier today waiting in a line that was so long, you’d have thought they were givin’ out the cure for stupid at the other end…and it was moving slower than a herd of three-legged turtles marching through peanut butter. When I finally got to the cashier, she said, with a straight face…”Doesn’t being at the mall around Christmas time make you feel happy?” I looked at her in the same way that my wife looks at me when I try to explain to her what a zone coverage-scheme is in football…or the difference between a 67 and a 69 Camaro – and, as I did this, mouth completely agape, I blurted out…”If by happy, you mean hopelessly trapped with no possibility of escape…than yes…I feel happy”.
No other words were exchanged between us for the duration of my purchase transaction. I’m sorry, I don’t mean to sound like a Scrooge…really I don’t – but I cannot take shopping around this time of year!! I know, I know, you’re saying (probably out loud too) “Get you’re shopping done earlier in the year Dummy!!” Well, you know what?…I’m a guy…that’s just not gonna happen. That does it, I’m getting everyone the same thing this year…a “What Would Tebow Do” bracelet!!!
Comments: