"There's A Jungle Cat In The Bathroom!!"

As I sit at my desk to write what it is that you are reading now (and also to check my e-mail and sports scores – oh look, what a shock…Flyers lose again…and apparently, I can increase the size of my penis in just 30 days), the calendar next to me insists that it’s Spring…and yet, the 4 inches of snow on my lawn mocks me through the window pane as if to say “The Groundhog was wrong Bi-otch!!…and you should probably click on that thing about the penis too” – Spring snow-fall is such a wise-ass.  It may not feel like it now, but warmer weather is just around the corner and, rest assured, before you know it, we’ll be complaining about sunburn and swamp-ass.  And if you think Spring snow-fall has an attitude…mid-August humidity is a real D*ck!!  Anyway, some friends and I are actually gonna get a brief reprieve from the fickle Philly forecast (say that 3 times fast – go ahead…I’ll wait).  Yes, on the very day the Christian world celebrates the resurrection of it’s Lord and Savior (no, not Rick Santorum or Sarah Palin)…we’re headin’ to Vegas for a bachelor party!!  Nice huh?  Now, the last bachelor party I went to was when I was still in my 20’s…and it wasn’t in Sin-City…or even Atlantic City.  So, naturally, people are asking if this trip is gonna be anything like “The Hangover”…my guess, based on the age and marital-status of most of the attendees, is that it’ll be more like “Grumpy Old Men” – but it should still be fun.  Now, if you’ll excuse me, I need to shovel a path for my mailman.